Tools for the Polish Monkey

We all like things that make life and applying polish easier. Especially when they are cheap. I found two little dears at Sally Beauty. First was an orange stick dipped in sanding grit. The second was ASP Manicure Saver.

ASP Manicure Saver is a mini version of the "I'm too lazy to pick that up!" tool, that coiled spring or stick with some metal fingers at the end that come out of a tube and grab whatever you don't want to bend over for. The nail buddy is a small pink plastic tube about 4 inches long, with a black button to make the little graspers come out. Then you put a cotton ball/pad in the metal fingers and release the button, and suddenly you have a way to remove polish from one or more nails or places on your hand without affecting your other nails!! Ok, I can't tell you how many times I have ruined other nails trying to fix one ruined fingernail. So I felt like a total idiot when I saw this, and simultaneously very happy someone thought of it. At $3.29 without Sally card, how can you say no?

ASP Manicure Saver:




The orange stick dipped in file sand is handy too. Made to get the underside of nails, you can get it under them to deal with under-nail cuticle, or to smooth filing roughness underneath the nail. At $0.39, without Sally card, sheesh, why not?

Month of Zoyas! - Zoya Tallulah

Zoya Tallulah is one of Zoya's summer collection polishes. It goes on well, has a nice shimmer. It's a pretty bright blue, looks a lot like many others out this summer, but hey, it's still pretty!

Zoya Tallulah:

Month of Zoyas! - Zoya Yasmeen

Zoya Yasmeen is a deep rich juicy purple with gold shimmer. Same formula, yummy color and shine, how could you go wrong? Love!!

Zoya Yasmeen:

A Month of Zoyas! - Zoya Sienna

Zoya Sienna is a bright orange jelly with orange/gold shimmer, and LOTS of it! It's fun and sunny. It has a good formula, much like the rest. Just don't overload your brush or expect opacity and you'll be just fine! Sienna is very sparkly, who can dislike that?

Zoya Sienna:

A MONTH OF ZOYAS!!!

This month I will feature a Zoya every day! I was very kindly gifted by Rebecca my (then) entire Zoya wishlist!! She went through Zoya's very cool polish exchange program, which I believe is now over -Update - It is extended until June 1! So I have a lot of seriously hot polishes to show you and to review for you!

Today is Zoya's Malia. I had wanted this polish for a long time. The color, a grape creme, just stuck with me even when I got a couple of other purple cremes. And I am glad it did! Malia is beautiful!

Zoya's creme formula is thick and sticky, like most cremes, but less than other people's. I may not even thin it. It went on well and did not run. One coat was quite sufficient! That bowled me over! Also it did not shrink when drying. I think this month is gonna be very fun!


Zoya Malia:

Essie's North Fork Collection

As many people were I was excited by Essie's North Fork Collection. Purported to be colors inspired by eastern beach towns, they looked very nice online, and in swatches.

My verdict: They're nice, but nothing super special.

Essie Greenport is a nice soothing green creme, but frankly you might not need it if you have Misa Dirty Sexy Money. Misa DSM is greyer, and a bit darker, but it is basically the same type of green. It wouldn't hurt to have both, Greenport is a nice shade and maybe "nicer" than DSM, more friendly, less cutting edge, if you know what I mean. But if you are not green crazy, or polish crazy, you could probably pick a similar color and not miss Greenport. But simultaneously I think it is nice and worth owning...

Essie Greenport:


Essie Shelter Island is a nice sky blue creme. It gets a nice C+. You can absolutely buy a cheaper polish and get this color, it is absolutely average and unnecessary. For my money China Glaze Caribbean Blue beats it hands down.

Essie Shelter Island:


Essie Sag Harbor is a great cloudy day sea grey-blue with shimmer. I think it's the winner of the bunch, strangely. You could probably find a polish close to this one, but frankly I don't know of any, so I love it and say BUY!! It really does remind me of sailing and blustery days at the shore battling the crisp wind in a beautiful sailboat, enjoying a hot coffee and the sea spray.

Essie Sag Harbor:


So anyway I guess I am at odds here. On one hand I like the collection, on the other hand I think you can kill your lemming for these a lot more cheaply elsewhere. You decide, chum!

More Sally Hansen Prisms!

As promised, here are more Sally Hansen Prism swatches! I get my discontinued Sally Hansens from CassieCosmetics on eBay. Quick efficient service and always what I ordered. Some prices are decent, some a bit eyebrow raising.

Anyway feast your eyes on the following!

Sally Hansen Prisms Lapis Amethyst:


Sally Hansen Prisms Fire Opal:


Sally Hansen Prisms Golden Cinnabar:


Sally Hansen Prisms Bronze Ruby:


Sally Hansen Prisms Scarlet Ruby:


Sally Hansen Prisms Coral Amber:

Nail of the Day - Nubar Mellow Yellow 4/28/09

Today is Nubar's Mellow Yellow. I was very meh about this when I saw the bottle, sent to me by the fantastic Carla.

But putting it on, I changed my mind. The formula of this frost shimmer by Nubar is amazing. It's like spreading on whipped mousse. It held to the brush well, and stayed exactly where I put it. It seriously felt like I was spreading whipped lemon mousse on my nails. It was fantastic!

And it turned out to be pretty interesting. Not quite a neon, but a bright lemon yellow with a subtle and nice lime green shimmer to it. I was happy with it! If you like yellows, try it! It's a nice change from the golden yellows.

Polish of the Day - Sally Hansen Chrome Burmese Ruby

Another luscious discontinued polish!! I see many more in the future. Thank you Rebecca!

These apply badly. Runny, and they dry so fast you are sure to get clumpage unless you apply very quickly. Also it shows EVERY nail ridge, use a ridge filler! I had to reapply three nails per hand.

I will, nonetheless, be getting more of these.

Sally Hansen Chrome Burmese Ruby, a burgundy metallic:


Tyler Durden's Opinion of Sally Hansen Burmese Ruby:
Ok, I got it. Shit, I lost it.

New MAC Rose Romance Limited Polish!

I swung by the mall today, to be greeted by a new MAC polish! Love & Friendship is a creme in the Rose Romance collection, a sort of dusty lavender grape color. It's a bit thick, but a drop of Poshe Polish Reviver should take care of it. It has nice coverage and I actually quite like it! It's chic and summery without being too pastel.

Buy before it sells out, like the Sugarsweet polishes.



Tyler Durden's Opinion of MAC Love & Friendship:
Forget about what you think you know about life, about friendship, and especially about you and me.

Nail of the Day - Sinful Hottie 4/24/09

Today's polish is Sinful Hottie!

Sinful is a drugstore brand, here at Walgreen's it sells for $2 a 0.5 ounce bottle. They have some pretty nice colors I will blog about later.

Sinful Hottie is a sheer denim blue jelly with a ton of glitter in it. The glitter is very much like the sparks you see in the depths of an opal, kinda candy colored without being pastel at all. It also has a jellylike texture from all the glitter. It spreads well and evenly, and dries very quickly, allowing many coats. I used four today, the picture is three. When you run your finger across the polish surface and it feels bumpy, Hottie is dry and ready for another coat. It's beautiful and simultaneously somehow blingy yet understated.

Pick Hottie up and enjoy!!




Tyler Durden's opinion of Sinful Hottie:
Recycling and speed limits are bullshit. They're like someone who quits smoking on his deathbed.

Essie Summer 2009 Neons

I LOVE these! As I blogged about when posting about Funky Limelight, the formula is pretty standard neon polish formula. They go on a bit streaky, they dry a bit too quickly, but they are pretty decent anyway, and relatively easy to use. And bright... WOW!! These are eye-popping, and very hard to photograph. You will not be disappointed, unless of course you dislike neons.

The first is a gorgeous, OPAQUE yellow neon, called Funky Limelight. I am going to get another bottle of this, I think it is outstanding in every way. An opaque yellow neon as bright as a highlighter marker? Instant win.



Next up is a soft pink called Punchy Pink. It's nice, you could probably call it hot pink were it not for another color in the series, Flirty Fuchsia, which really IS hot pink. This manages to be a softer pink while still neon. Who knew it was possible. Forgive the picture, it is so bright it just would not photograph well.



Third up is Perky Purple, a juicy hot reddish purple. I got a lot of compliments on this one, it's a stunning eyecatcher.



Last up is Flirty Fuchsia. As previously stated, it's HOT pink. Violent pink, and it almost vibrates on your finger. Sometimes a neon like this can look orange toned on the fingernails, but this stays very true to the color in the bottle, as all of this collection does. And it's gratifying and impressive that they do. Once again, bad photo, this eyebleeder even shocked my camera.




So, if you like neons or are even curious, BUY THESE!!! I think they are hot stuff!


Tyler Durden's opinion of Essie 2009 Neons:
Time to stand up for what you believe in.

Similar or Matching Polishes - #1 in a Series: Black Jellies With Red Glitter

This isn't exactly timely, but it serves as a good beginning, especially since some of the polishes, maybe all, are still available.

Black jellies with red glitter. Lovely aren't they? Probably the best known is China Glaze Lubu Heels. If you buy it off a wholesale site online, pretty darn reasonable too. A lot of people I know love it.

Don't ever buy it for $$$$ if it gets discontinued! You'll have many places to find the same exact color. And I mean EXACT same polish. Not similar, not a good match, not a darn fine stand-in, I mean the SAME polish.

Icing Signature Runway, Piggy Polish Midnight Fireflies, Petites Black Rouge, and Precision Rebel Red - all exactly the same as China Glaze Lubu Heels. All black jelly with exactly the same size and shade red glitter. So buy the cheapest, honey!!


Index: Piggy Polish Midnight Fireflies
Middle: China Glaze Lubu Heels
Ring: Icing Signature Runway
Pinky: Petites Black Rouge






Precision Rebel Red not pictured, but guarantee you it is the same as above polishes.


Tyler Durden's opinion of black jellies with red glitter:
How's that working out for you, being clever.

In Your Easter Bonnet...

Okay I don't have an Easter bonnet. I don't have kids. I'm not even Christian. But I do like Easter! I love the bunnies and the pretty, fun eggs. Oh and there's that little issue of candy and chocolate bunnies. So we all go to brunch and wear something fun and springlike. It's a chance to go out in festive clothes and enjoy the spring weather.

This year's 1st Annual Easter Manicure:
Green: Sally Beauty Pea-Body
Blue: Sally Beauty Periwinkle
Pink: Sally Beauty Blissful Kiss



Tyler Durden's opinion of my Easter Manicure:
Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

Sally Hansen Opal Nail Glazes

I saw these mentioned on Scrangie's blog. Just a mention, but I was intrigued and sought them out. I could only find a scant few pictures of them on FlickR, on Lextard's photostream. Hence this post, because I know people are looking for pictures of them and I want to help.

I took a chance and bought some, because I wanted to experience the "lustrous glow of real crushed opals". WHOOO REAL CRUSHED OPALLLLLSSSSSSS!! Anyway they are nice, but it's not like strapping a fire opal to your nail or anything. They tend to be sheer, slightly opalescent (of course), and in soft pinks, subtle reds, and very light purples. The formula is very nice, not runny, not thick, and easy to apply. Super easy. They dry quickly, but not so quickly you get clumps or remove dried polish with a second stroke. They have a nice wide brush (not as wide as OPI DS brushes) and a wide flattish stick. This makes it even easier to apply.

These also are discontinued. Eyeroll. You can find them on eBay and suchlike. Eventually I will get some more, but until now enjoy a few!

Sally Hansen Royal Opal:


Sally Hansen Amber Opal:


Sally Hansen Rose Gold Opal:


Sally Hansen Wildfire Opal:


Sally Hansen Red Opal:


Tyler Durden's opinion of Sally Hansen Opal Nail Glazes: I am Jack's raging bile duct.

OPI Designer Series Royal

I love the OPI Designer Series. Sparkly, the polish goes on like a dream and dries quickly, and they are coruscating with glitter!!!

One I got recently has made my Hits List: OPI DS Royal.



Wow. Just wow. Not only does it have all benefits of the DS formula. it looks like THAT. You can find OPI DS Royal if you look around, or you can as of today. As usual, the idiocy of "Limited Edition" has struck.

Tyler Durden's opinion of OPI DS Royal:
Who gives a s**t? No one's watching. What do you care?

China Glaze Summer Days Collection

Not long after I got interested in nail polish, the China Glaze Summer Days Collection came out. I saw the pictures of the bottles and the ad before I saw swatches of the polish on someone's nails, and I was not impressed. The colors looked very average and the ad was just awful that weird looking lady with her finger in her mouth and her cheeks all sucked in, and those chalky looking raspberries on her fingers? Ewww.

Anyway, I did see pictures after a bit on my friend Carla, and I was knocked out. The colors were so fruity and vibrant, and SO shiny! So I got a few of them and thus started my passion for China Glaze's glass fleck polishes. I just love everything about them. They sort of glow. The glass fleck really works with light to make these polishes vibrant and incredibly shiny. I adore glass fleck and must own them all!

These polishes are a good thickness, and not runny. They apply smoothly, and while you get plenty of coverage in two coats, some are very "jelly" translucent and you may still see your nail underneath. This does not bother me, I think it enhances their glow. If it does bother you, you may wish to stick with Strawberry Fields, Watermelon Rind and Grape Juice, as these are the most opaque, SF being entirely opaque.

Strawberry Fields, a deep opaque pink with gold glass fleck:


Raspberry Festival, a juicy red jelly with glass fleck:


Watermelon Rind, a bluish green jelly with glass fleck:


Cherry Pie, a hot orange/red jelly, and my favorite:


Orange Marmalade. Yeah, it's orange:


Grape Juice, a sort of Koolaid idea of what grape juice looks like, but still pretty:


Tyler Durden's Review of the Summer Days Collection:
Self Improvement is masturbation.

Nail Polish and a New Blog

I never used to be interested in nail polish. I'd be attracted, sometimes, by colors I happened across in the drugstore or department store, but if I ever did chance to buy a color I never used it. Attempts to do so resulted in nails that looked a lot like Robert Smith's lipstick.

But recently I met a new friend, Carla. Polish obsessed, she had a huge FlickR account full of amazing pictures of nail polish. she began talking to my friends about nail polish, and I looked at her pictures, and somehow I developed a desire to try all this beautiful polish. So, Carla sent me some. and when I say some, I mean a ton!

I realized nail polish is a fun way to express yourself and get a bit of color. It's inexpensive, easy after a bit of practice, and it's pretty. I enjoy it even more than the people around me. It's as fun as makeup, clothes, shoes, jewelry, and there's a lot of variety.
So, there is the problem - the variety. There's a lot of nail polish. And a fair amount of nail blogs about polish. But I still can't always find pictures of what I want. So I figured there is room for one more blog about it.

So welcome to my blog, with a nutty Fight Club theme. Polish Mayhem is a play on "Project Mayhem" if you hadn't noticed. so enjoy the theme, or you can ignore it and focus on the polish.

Enjoy! Feel free to email me at polishmayhem@gmail.com with comments, suggestions, and requests.


MollyHell